I can safely say, for the most part, this year sucked. This year was really hard for me. I started off having to make pretty much the biggest decision of my life-where I would go to college, and money was kind of dictating that decision. I had really wanted to be a New York City girl, but since I didn't get in to Columbia, and I'm poor, i ended up in Fredonia. At the time it was not my ideal situation. I spent a lot of time fighting with my parents about college too. About how much I was talking to them, about how often I was coming home (which was minimal and the way I wanted it), how I was spending my time, how I never talked about studying, how only talked about my 'nerd' clubs. I had to get rid of some friends because they were toxic to my life. I fought with some really close friends and almost lost them. I've had my heart broken, and I have spent way too many nights up late, doubting myself in every way possible. I've wanted to change majors, worried about money, felt completely alone, felt overcrowded, and utterly lost. I really am totally ready for this year to be over.
That in mind, this year wasn't all bad. I ended up in probably the best posisble place for an Education major, as well as a giant nerd. I've made some fantastic new friends who I am so thankful for and absolutely love and miss terribly right now. I found out who really matters in my life, the people who have stuck by me, checked up on me when i posted angry stuff on facebook, bought me starbucks when I've had a bad day, sent a text just to say hi, showed up in Fredonia unexpectedly and those that lept me sane everytime I thought I was really about to lose it. I joined clubs where I fit in and made most of my friends and started playing Quidditch. And I moved out and started kind of living on my own.
A lot of things got me through, like my awesome suitemates who would do anything for me at the drop of a hat, my friends who always know what to say to snap me out of it, Quidditch and Nerf, Harry Potter, my music, writing, and those nights where all I needed was to put on some nice clothes and strut around like I owned the place. I also have discovered my love for The expanded Star Wars universe and rekindled my love affair with the Sith. I have found myself, whenever I'm stressed, upset or at a loss reciting the creed. Peace is a lie, there is only Passion. Through Passion I gain Strength. Through Strength I gain Victory. Through Victory my chains are broken.
Next year. 2012. I don't know if the world is ready for me next year. They might need more time to prepare. Because I'm not taking any shit anymore from anymore. I'm out to kick ass, always. To take my life into my own hands. To take a chance. Fall in love with the wrong person. Live on the edge, break the rules (well, more rules) becuase if not now when? College is my time to discover the world and myself. So it's time to make some mistakes, take some chances and enjoy everything I can. I'm going to drink up every experience, every oppurtunity, and leave myself nothing to regret. 2012 will be my "no holds barred" year because if this world really ends next Decemeber, at least I'll have had some fun.
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